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“They made up the laws by their own minds”

It’s a warm evening sometime in the latter part of the 21st Century in the capital of the Caliphate; the Caliph is sitting around drinking tea with his advisor. They are discussing the affairs of the Caliphate when the topic turns to the recently demised system of Capitalism…

Advisor: O Caliph, where did it all go wrong for Capitalism?

Caliph: Ah yes, the death of Capitalism or ‘Capitualism’ as I call it. Of course you were not around and will not remember the dark days of the late 20th and early 21st century. The Capitualist West was on its knees; financially, politically and morally. It limped along for a few more years but by this time its prognosis was terminal.

Advisor: Tell me about Capitalism and its ways. …….and why do you call it ‘Capitualism’?

Caliph [laughing aloud]: Private joke, it’s a made up word but it’s true. For years the ruling and governing classes in the western world were subservient to corporate, business or other vested interests. Despite the façade of claiming they represented the people or the will of the people the politicians and governments of the US, UK and Europe were in fact in the throes of big business and multinationals. They largely represented their interests; not the masses.

Repeatedly they would make laws and regulations that benefited the interests of industry and commerce at the expense of the people. In the English language, to capitulate is to surrender or lay down unconditionally; to give up without resistance. And this was by and large how western governments and their officials became. That’s why I call it Capitualism.

For decades corruption and scandals would emerge at regular intervals of corporate influence on the legislative process via donations, loans, use of lobbyists or cosying up to political parties. This was common in many countries. And of course it was a revolving door with former Prime Ministers, Ministers and Presidents joining these very same entities after office.

Although these Capitualists elevated man to be legislator, determiner of right and wrong, it was never the elected officials in power who made the laws. They might of drafted the laws in Parliaments or Congress but were heavily influenced by large corporations, Media Moghuls and the like…..this is the irony.

Advisor [Incredulous]: What, they used to make up the laws by their own minds? How stupid and irrational; where did this idea came from?

Caliph: It was the basis of Capitualism; man as sovereign, the legislator…..they didn’t refer to the Creator, Allah (swt) at all for guidance in temporal affairs, to judge right from wrong or seek guidance. Secularism was their political creed. However, elevating man to law maker started centuries earlier. With the Greeks I believe. A philosopher called Protagoras once said ‘man is the measure of all things’.

Advisor: Ok, I understand. ‘Sickularism’ caused many problems in the world. These sickularists eh! [smiling, pleased with his use of words]. Muslims can never be secular as Islam covers both spiritual and political matters.

Caliph: Ok, very funny I’ll do the jokes but you are correct.

Advisor: What were the consequences of this viewpoint?

Caliph: Where do I start! On every level western societies were plagued by problems which arose fundamentally from putting man-with all his imperfections, biases, weaknesses and lack of perfect foresight-at the centre of their world view.

Sure, new fads, philosophies, schools of thought arose over time; left, right, centre, neo- this, liberal that, classical, modern, conservative, social democrat, democracy, dictatorship…these were all variations on a theme. All agreed on the human mind being the basis of law-making and judgement.

This led to inherent instability as laws passed in one generation became redundant the next as tastes, mores and ideas changed. Look at the Capitualist social system and its effects on women, the old; there was no consistency, no stability.

Advisor: But I read that the Capitualist West generated unrivalled prosperity and growth. Vast billions were created with new inventions and technological advancement. I think I still have one of their phones, the iPhone 500s. Still works.

Caliph: Yes, large amounts of wealth were certainly generated but in reality this did not descend down to the common people. The Capitualists used to have a currency….now what was it, I forget… Yes, the dollar. It was their strongest currency, yet in the early 21st Century billions of people lived on less than $1 a day. Millions perished due to lack of food and shelter, especially in Africa and the Muslim world with its corrupt western backed rulers at the time.

In the late 2000’s when the banks, which were large financial institutions that kept and lent out money, got into difficulty and could not pay their way do you know what the Capitualist governments used to do?

Advisor: No, did they close them down for being so irresponsible?

Caliph: You would think so, but they actually took more money from the common people in taxes, by raising prices and printing more money so that their banks would survive. You see what I mean by their capitulating.

These institutions created financial products no-one understood; sold them to people who couldn’t afford them; by banks that no-one could control with the tacit acceptance of governments and a political class which was accountable to no-one; not the people certainly, all the while beholden to these very same corporate interests. A vicious circle I think you will agree.

Advisor: How did these laws affect Muslims living in the Capitualist West?

The Capitualist West often talked of its principles and rule of law being applied equally upon all people. In fact, Capitualism had a track record of state sponsored discrimination for centuries against various minorities and immigrants; Catholics, the Irish, Jews and so on.

By the late 20th century, Capitualism realised that only the implementation of Islam was a challenge to their way of life on a global scale. At the same time, abuse of Islam, its rules and Muslims became rampant within most of the western wold.

There was this one French leader, I remember him vividly. Had issues with his height. Nicolas Sarcastic was his name. Initially, the legislative process was engineered to pass laws that forbade women from wearing the hijab in public buildings; Sarcastic went further and outlawed the Niqab. A few years later a law was passed that disallowed anyone with a beard of 3 inches or more with ‘Beard police’ patrolling mosques. In 2020, European governments outlawed Zibbah [slaughtering of meat] saying that animal rights trumped the rights of people to kill if based on religious grounds. You could not make it up even if you tried!

Advisor: What became of France?

Caliph: After the Eurozone crisis of 2012 with European countries such as Greece and Italy on the financial brink, many of them were taken over by the German Bundesbank [central bank]. The French economy folded a few years later and the country was annexed. Nicolas Sarcastic became the little known provincial minister for the western region of the Greater German Republic. Very apt don’t you think. But he was not alone. There were others. The UK also had a Prime Minister who talked a lot about Islam in the early 21st Century.

Advisor: You mean Nick Clegghorn

Caliph: No, don’t be silly, he was never Prime Minister! The one before the really weird one Boris…..

Advisor: Dave Cameroon

Caliph: That’s him, Dave Cameroon. He even went to live with a Muslim family once before he became PM. His government continued the same policies of most European governments. They had these strange terms for describing Muslims

Advisor:[laughing to himself] What, like Mozlim, Moozlim, Muzlim, Moslem….

Caliph: No, No …but they were obsessed with creating Muslims in their own image; those that were ‘good’ and those that were ‘bad’. There were difficult times for Muslims to hold onto their identity. As the mood of the public hardened against Muslims and Islam, fuelled by successive governments and the Media, they in turn passed ever draconian laws. This is what happens when man is the legislator; biases and prejudices can quite easily become enshrined in state law.

And over the years new legislation was enacted in the name of greater assimilation and a shared identity; every child in school had to sing the words to Rule Britannia before morning lessons. Backwards as well. New immigrants had to learn the complete works of William Shakespeare before they were granted residency.

And then there was the time deregulation led to the supermarket takeover of the UK Healthcare system on the pretext of better efficiency; reward points got you a consultation with a Doctor and only by showing sufficient customer loyalty could you get a medical procedure done in the operating theatres which were conveniently situated at the back of the supermarket. You see, laws were continually changing with dire consequences.

Advisor: What became of Dave Cameroon

Caliph: Rather tragic actually. When the 2012 Olympics in London finished early because the money ran out as the sponsors funding the spectacle went into liquidation the end was nigh….and when Argentina recaptured the Falkland Islands shortly after the Men’s 100 metre final that was, how shall I say, the syrup on the Baklava.

Advisor: I understand the land of America was the strongest Capitualist nation in the early 21st century and kept fighting wars with the Muslim world. How did these violent Capitualists justify such aggression?

Caliph: Yes, this was America led by Barack Obombma at this time. He followed a rather dim chap called Georgy Porgy Bush who invaded Iraq and Afghanistan. US and western aggression in the Muslim world continued for decades simply because they controlled the key institutions that permitted state sanctioned war against others. Even when they flouted their own rules and laws there was no-one to hold them to account. Obombma carried on in the same vein as his predecessors.

Advisor: All Muslims know about Iraq and Afghanistan. My grandfather says those wars first got him to work to re-establish the Caliphate when he was a young man. That and the fall of Assad of Syria that followed.

Caliph: In the final analysis it was never about them. Capitualism would have happily carried on for years thinking it was the way of life for all humanity. Sure, they had issues and problems and the Arab uprisings of 2011 and 2012 really shook their place in the world. But it was the re-establishment of the caliphate that finally brought about the end of the Capitualist way of life.

Advisor: How was the Caliphate re-established?

Caliph: That is a discussion for another evening!

At this point, an assistant enters the room with a message for the Caliph. The Caliph smiles and turns to his advisor.

Caliph: It’s Sheikh Salmond the fourth from United Scotlandia…..he’s having some difficulty with his rebellious southern province. We have some work to do.